Go-enryo kudasai (ご遠慮ください) is a formal, polite way to ask someone to refrain from doing something. In a business context, it is the soft, cushioned way of saying ‘don’t do this,’ designed to maintain social harmony (wa) without direct confrontation.
If you have spent any time in Tokyo or Osaka, you have likely seen ‘Go-enryo kudasai’ plastered on signs at ticket gates, inside quiet train cars, or perhaps on the back of a business document. To the uninitiated, it looks like a polite request. To a native, it is a clear boundary.
When I first arrived in Japan, I often mistook this phrase for a suggestion. I remember standing in a shared office space, speaking a bit too loudly on my phone, only to see my manager gently place a note on my desk that said, ‘Telefon wa go-enryo kudasai.’ It wasn’t a suggestion; it was a firm instruction cloaked in velvet.
The Anatomy of ‘Go-enryo’
The core of this phrase is enryo (reserve/restraint), a concept you can explore further in our guide to Japanese Enryo. In business, you aren’t just asking for ‘no’; you are asking the other person to exercise their own sense of restraint to avoid causing trouble for others. It is the pinnacle of Japanese indirect communication.
Scenario: You are in a meeting and someone asks to film the presentation.
Correct Response: ‘Shoushou omachi kudasai… eizou no satsuei wa go-enryo itadaite orimasu.’ (Please wait a moment… we must ask that you refrain from video recording.)
Common Mistakes Foreigners Make
The most common error is using this phrase toward your superiors or clients without proper softening. Because it is a request, saying it too bluntly—even with the standard suffix—can sound like you are lecturing them. Always pair it with an apology or a reason. Instead of just saying ‘No, don’t do that,’ phrase it as ‘I apologize, but we must ask you to refrain from that.’
Pro-tip: When declining a gift or an offer in a business negotiation, do not use ‘Go-enryo kudasai.’ It is for actions. For refusing items or favors, use ‘Kizukai naku’ or ‘O-ki-no-doku desu ga’ to be more natural.
Slang Variations and Nuance
While you won’t hear ‘Go-enryo’ as common slang, you will hear it abbreviated in casual settings among coworkers who have a very close relationship. Sometimes, a peer might jokingly say, ‘Enryo shite!’ (Refrain!), but keep in mind that this is strictly for people you are very comfortable with. In any official capacity, including emails and client calls, keep the full ‘Go-enryo kudasai’ or the even humbler ‘Go-enryo itadakemasu to saiwai desu’ (We would appreciate if you could refrain).
Mastering this phrase is essential for navigating the complex web of Japanese business etiquette. It is the language of professional boundaries. Use it wisely, use it softly, and you will find that doors open much easier when you know how to close them politely.
